discovery

Guest

Ok, now I'm disgusted.

The day my number transfer was received at Vonage I called the Number Transfer Department to inform them of my concern: I was moving and my old POTS line would be disconnected in 30 days - my number transfer had to be completed before then or I would lose the number. (Disconnected numbers can't be ported.) I was reassured that this should be no problem.

Well, 4 weeks later my number was disconnected without the transfer having taken place. I waited another week, but still heard nothing from Vonage. (Despite their promise in the Number Transfer Request Form to keep me updated in a timely manner about the status of my transfer.)

I was told that once Vonage confirmed that the number transfer had failed, my temporary virtual number would become my "permanent" Vonage number. The only problem is that my temporary virtual number is in an exchange in another county. It's a toll call for anyone in town to call me on that number. (Given that some number transfers fail, why would Vonage assign a temporary virtual number outside the home exchange??) So I called customer support and then tech support and then customer support.

Here is what I was told: Add a virtual number in the proper exchange - customer service will remove the charges - then when the number transfer is cancelled, that virtual number will become the new permanent number. I followed this advice. Indeed, I added the new virtual number while I was on the phone with the customer service rep who recommended this "solution" to me - he walked me through the steps and then he removed the charge for the virtual number.

So, with all of this in place I asked SBC to change the intercept message on my now cancelled line. 'The number has changed. The new number is [new virtual number.] Please make a note of it.' And I start to tell everyone I know what my new number is.

The final piece to this delightful puzzle: Once the number transfer was cancelled, I checked my information on the web Dashboard. My old temporary number has not been removed. It is now my new permanent number. And the virtual number I was told to add is still a virtual number - with a charge of $4.99 per month!

I called back to customer service and entered into that oh so familiar realm where EVERYTHING ****. It goes like this: "Oh we can't make a virtual number into a permanent number." "You should never have been told to do that." "We'll have to create another number for you and make that your permanent number." But I've already given out the [virtual] number. "Sorry there isn't anything I can do." "I can transfer you to tech support, but I can assure you right now there is nothing they can do either." Blah, blah blah, etc, etc, etc, etc . . .

So I made a startling discovery that I want to share. I always assumed that Vonage and MCI and Comcast and the home inspector who failed to see the faulty wiring were all different entities. Now I understand that THEY ARE ALL ONE. They all reside in the same place: The Realm Where Everything ****.

In closing, I'd like to share my new universal script for customer service:

"Hello. Everything ****. How can I not help you? Could you please restate your problem in more detail so that when I don't help, you can feel worse? I see, well, you know, this is really all your fault. We wouldn't help you even if it was our fault, but I'm sure you've done something wrong that makes you deserve this treatment. You want to complain to my supervisor? Please, be my guest, he's even better at this Everything **** stuff than I am. The Federal Communications Commission? Hah! They suck even more than we do! Of course we aren't regulated by them, which is a shame, because if we were then you could complain to them and feel really really bad when they do nothing to help you either. You're going to take your business to one of our competitors? We all work together! In fact, I'd be happy to transfer you directory to one of their customer dis-service departments right now if you wish. Have a nice day!"

Posts: 33 · Vonage Forum Junior Joined: Jan 18, 2004 Posts: 33

Quote:

"Hello. Everything ****. How can I not help you? Could you please restate your problem in more detail so that when I don't help, you can feel worse? I see, well, you know, this is really all your fault. We wouldn't help you even if it was our fault, but I'm sure you've done something wrong that makes you deserve this treatment. You want to complain to my supervisor? Please, be my guest, he's even better at this Everything **** stuff than I am. The Federal Communications Commission? Hah! They suck even more than we do! Of course we aren't regulated by them, which is a shame, because if we were then you could complain to them and feel really really bad when they do nothing to help you either. You're going to take your business to one of our competitors? We all work together! In fact, I'd be happy to transfer you directory to one of their customer dis-service departments right now if you wish. Have a nice day!

I work on a helpdesk, some days, I feel like I should answer the phone that way. Was that original? That's pretty good stuff. Sad but true.

Posts: 61 · Full Forum Member Joined: Dec 04, 2003 Posts: 61

The thing I've come to realize lately, is that whenever there's a problem, it always comes down to the fact that someone did not do their job correctly. Am I perfect? No. Do I make mistakes at my job, hell, I'm a programmer, of course I do. But the difference is that I own up, I go in and fix the problem. I don't tell my customer, oh well that's not what you asked for, I did exactly what you wanted. I say, oh, I think there was a miscommunication, but I can definately get it to do X.

The big thing I notice is how nonchalantly people do things in their job. The other day I get home from Blockbuster, the phone rings, blockbuster guy says, "I gave you the wrong video... you'll have to bring that one back and get yours." I was pissed, not at the fact that he made a mistake, but that he was so unapologetic.

This happens all the time, you get your oil changed and some dilweed sprays oil all over your engine. You order a burger with no onions, and it's covered in onions. I can't remember the last time I hired someone to do something and they did it right, the first time.

So everyone take heed, be the best at what you do, pay attention, take pride in your work, and strive to be efficient so that the work you do gets to others in the fashion it was designed to, and so they don't end up ranting on some board like this.

Posts: 220 · Vonage Forum Master Joined: Aug 19, 2003 Posts: 220

Dan:

Oh, I'm sorry, I know you've been through it -- but you had me rolling on the floor. Thanks for the good laugh.

Laurel